Before surgery and even before my bad flare I decided I was going to start exercising a bit more.  I know exercise is good for a lot, not just body but also the mind. I was hoping to get control over my own body, but instead lost it. Anyway, I’m back in control again, well aiming for it anyway. I am training with a physio, which has felt really good. I recently also started Qigong. In Sweden we have an organisation called ILCO which is for people with stomas. I became a member shortly after surgery and not too long ago the group in Malmö arranged a Qigong group. Of course I jumped at it. My mum has always spoken very highly about Qigong, and I have seen her do it multiple times. I have been doing it for 4 weeks now and I am really enjoying it. Qigong is often translated into ‘life energy’ which refers to energy circulating through the body, balancing life energies. Great for the health. Qigong works with physical posture, breathing techniques and focused intentions.

I enjoy the calmness and the soft fluid movements. I find it very fascinating how the more I do it I feel the energy building up and I can feel how I am working with energy inside and outside of my body. In my mind I also imagine it being very beautiful to watch, however I highly doubt it looks as beautiful as I think in real life.  After 4 weeks of doing it once a week I have come to actually Wanting to do it every day! I think this is progress with my personal ability to work out as well as my personal ability to try to find an inner peace and calm. I usually need things to happen and to happen fast, but I need to learn to calm down. I know it’s good to learn more controlled movements and to take a moment to do exercise in a peaceful calm environment listening to calming music thinking about my breathing too. In other words, I am really feeling the benefits and would recommend it.
I am also still going to physio and am so happy I took the decision to get in touch with someone and start working out my poor weak muscles with someone who knows what is best to do. I have now managed to build up a start of a normal strength. I still have a long way to go before I am back to my “normal” strength, and energy is still a long way off but apart from those aspects it is all going forward I would say. And it feels good. Apart from when I come home after lunch, having worked the morning (well really it happens when I work the afternoon hours too) and my full body is aching like a bitch and all I can do is lay down and feel that pulsating wave starting at my feet flowing up to my head. Ah the joy!

So, way back last year, I got Axel to go buy me some training clothes. He had free range of everything and anything all I asked for was a sports bra and trousers. He came home with this set. The most colourful he could find because after all, he knows me and he knows how much I love colours. Maybe he also thought that if is was colourful I might wear it more?
I remember the night he came home with them. I didn’t like them. I thought they were too tight, and were too difficult to get into and to get out of. I almost got him to take them back but he told me to try them the following day again. I tried them the following day and felt the same about them but I didn’t want to upset him and make him take them back so I thought ‘what the heck’. Now I am so grateful for them, and I love them! It is so comfortable to work out in these clothes and I LOVE the fact that they have a high waist keeping Stevie in place and protected and no one would ever even guess Stevie is there! I am happy that I can train and feel like Stevie is safe, wont get caught in anything, or fall off. Yeah what can I say, I have a boyfriend who is good at shopping for me. Maybe I should send him out for all my things haha 😉

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Well I found out today that my stoma bag delivery won’t arrive until Monday, maybe Tuesday. I don’t understand why it takes so long. The first time I ordered it came within 2 days, when I ordered it to be delivered straight home. The past two times I’ve ordered to arrive at the shop and instead it has taken nearly a week. So I’m down to my last couple of bags and thought I’d make them a bit more fun and happy with my new pens. Well if nothing else I will laugh when I see them! The randomly shaped ‘star’ like things are ok, but Marie from Disneys ‘Aristocats’ just looks hilarious! The way the pens started bleeding out by her eyes have made her look a bit creepy! But hey, I’m still pretty happy with it baring in mind I haven’t drawn for a while, don’t usually draw cartoons, and was drawing with pens that bleed on a strange fabric material! Haha! Well I hope they make you laugh, and I’m looking forward to getting cheered up by them this weekend!

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