Wow, I know it’s been a while, sorry! Here comes a little update as I am laid on the sofa resting my aching body! So I have now managed my first week back at work full time. The last time I worked full time at the foundry was about a year and four months ago, and the last time I worked was six months ago. I have since the end of June been unemployed due to there not being enough work at the foundry. I have enjoyed the time as I was at that point working 75% and was struggling with that. I feel bad or guilty saying this, and felt bad all summer saying that I enjoyed the time off, time for me, time for rest and recuperation and doing things that make me happy, specially after the year I had, and the fact that I have worked none stop since I was 15 without ever being unemployed. Anyway, in November I started a course where the plan was to learn how to weld to be able to use that in the foundry however the course wasn’t just welding and I actually got to learn a mix of things, like reading drawings, cutting and bending metal and making things, like a light holder, a coal lighter and a mini bbq, pretty cool but during the course I felt how my health was going downhill. I wasn’t happy there and the days were slow. It was a course through the job centre for unemployed people so they could get factory jobs so the energy of half the people there was very slow, and the course was extremely slow. Yes I did meet some really lovely people, which was great, and I did learn to use new machines and did get some new skills, but I felt like I was wasting my time as I would never want to work in a factory, and the foundry doesn’t have half the machines they did. My energy was low, my mood was even lower and I felt I was just wishing the days away, and I knew that if I carried on I would have run myself down completely and wouldn’t have been able to start work when I was meant to. So I took the wise decision to quite the course and try to get myself back on track.

I had a lovely Christmas off, mum and sis came here and we had plenty of quality time. My mood has still been unstable and yes, I am in the process of getting more help. Anyway, I started back at work on Monday and told myself that this week I would just concentrate on work. I know it will take time to start to feel “normal” or for my body to even partially learn to get used to things, so I am gonna have to be extra nice to myself. It was good fun being back, and my lovely boss has even found me an extra (and new) task for me to do in order for me to go have lay downs at work. I can now take a few brakes and lay on the sofa, while trying to get the company a bit moderna and into the world of social media! I am by far any good with social media and technology but I will take this task happily as my body is over the moon to be able to lay down during the day for 10 mins every now and again, also I don’t feel as bad or like I am skiving and instead I feel like I am actually doing something good while laying down! Win win definitely!

This week has pretty much been get up, go to work, come home, shower, cook and eat, lay on sofa then go to bed and sleep before doing it all again, but that is ok! So today I have left it completely open for me. I am having a me day, on my own, Axel is out doing his things and I am laid in my pjs still, with a Disney film on tv as I am writing this. I think I have more muscles hidden then I realised becuase im aching inplaces i didnt know could ache, and my joints are aching and my head is foggy and heavy. My day is empty of plans, musts or anything. I think I am gonna have a little nap and rest, then I might have a shower, and I might go for a walk, thinking it could be good with some fresh air and to get my blood pumping a bit, then I will see how I feel and just chill or find something to do, but as I said, its a clear day with no pressures!

So I think I am gonna stop rambling on about nothing, making little sense and get some rest! I hope to soon be back and sharing some more, just thought I would leave a little update 🙂

Last night I tried reading my book, which currently is Jane Eyre, and both the girl came to be close to me and suddenly I was asleep. Such is life I guess! Hoping for more snoozes like this today! Love to you all! Speak soon again!

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